Self-Help
It's OK That You're Not OK
Megan Devine
4.3 (48000) 8 min read 5 key ideasPremium
A grief educator challenges the cultural pressure to 'move on' from loss, arguing that grief is not a problem to be fixed but an experience to be witnessed.
Key takeaways
- Grief Doesn't Need to Be Fixed, Only Genuinely Witnessed
- Well-Intentioned But Harmful Comments Often Reflect This Fixing Impulse
- Genuine Support Involves Presence and Acknowledgment, Not Solutions
- Grief Doesn't Follow a Predictable Timeline or Linear Progression
- Living Alongside Grief Represents Genuine Adaptation, Not Resolution or Moving On
Action checklist
- Allow yourself to feel grief today without trying to fix or rush through it
- Resist the urge to find a silver lining today — just acknowledge what hurts
- Reach out to someone today who can simply witness your grief, not solve it
Final takeaway
Devine's closing invitation: understand genuine grief adaptation as 'living alongside' loss rather than achieving complete resolution or simply 'moving on,' applying the book's witnessing-not-fixing framework to your own or others' ongoing grief experience without pressure toward premature or complete resolution.
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